Glass Half Broken
Someone told me today that I don’t smile as much as I used to.
“Compared to when?” I asked.
“I don’t know…before.”
I’m so talented in the area of hiding my feelings and acting ”as if”.
I was shocked to discover that I’d been wearing pain and loneliness on my sleeve for the world to see. I’m torn between wanting to shout at anyone who will listen or protecting the painful treasure in my heart.
S calls what is happening “texture”. She claims I have texture to my life because I left my heart with You. I’m like the surface of an oil painting. Divots and welts on my soul.
I call what is happening to my soul “starvation”. Straved for knowledge, direction, connection, intimacy… with you.
Fear used to run my life. Now it’s regret.
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